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razor14150
Life is just one big F*** over. If its not one thing its another... Why? I question alot of things about myself, my irl family my friends.... I just dont know. I was supposed to be back in NY the 19th or 20th... 21st the latest... and here it is the 24th and Im still stuck here. Im here in VA doing the same thing day in and day out, doling absolutly nothing productive... and its depressing... Why I dont know. I just like to feel like Im doing something worth while and well lately its been just the oppsite so its dragging me down a bit. I'll be fine tho. I wake up shower.. after that I normally get online and check my dragon adopters, gundam-storm, yahoo and aim mail, then chat for a little bit till my friend gets up. From there most of the time I'll go into the other room and either watch tv or play need for speed carbon on the xbox 360. then later that night make something to eat and probably watch tv. after dinner most of the time my friend will go back to the computer and ill either watch tv, go for a walk or play the game. By the end of the night i normally wind up going for a walk by myself and listen to music before returning to whats home here in VA and going to sleep. Theres not one thing thats productive there and its bugging me... Well It sucks. But other then me doing nothing Im still alive so I guess thats good. As for my IRL family back in NY... me and my sister are getting along... for the mean time. *crosses claws* dont jinx it... :P But my moms doing alright shes been working alot lately. My moms BF I have no idea aboutt and I seriously need to have a talk with him because Im tored of him taking advantage of my mom... He dont pay rent, he dont pay bills, he complains if my mom needs a ride anywere.... He needs to start paying rent helping with the bills and food and quit complaining about if me and my sister have a dissagreement of if one of us do something... its agravating.... your watching tv in the living room and your moms bf goes to bed and every 10-20 minutes he comes out and bitches to either turn off or turn down the tv... when the tv is barely even up.. and i know im not deaf... As for friends... well the friend I live with here in VA is a bit clingy even when I have a mate. He says hes just being affectionate when he groups me or kisses me or lays on top of me when im sleeping.... my mate knows hes doing this and well my mates told him to back off but he dosent. I cant really confront him because I dont know anyone else down here and if he dicides to kick me out im screwed.. and not in a good way. And any time I do confront him he twists my words around were what im thinking is wrong and hes right... I cant take mass mind games right now. The same friend has my psyco annalizing conversations and wanting me to explain how I feel. ooo and the one thing that pisses me off is the fact i was talking to one of his friends on my yim and me and this fur was getting in an argument... well my mom called from NY and i needed to talk to her so he dicides to take over thinking he talks like me.... he may but he cant predict how im going to handel certin situations.... but i just dont like him taking over my conversations. Another friend I know online is ubber in love with me and well I told him I dont love him but i dont mind his company as a friend he INSISTS we are ment to be togeather.... kinda creepy. I may have lost my big brother ((furry brother)) becuase of a recent argument i had with him. I dont know if many know how solitary creatures dragons are but this might shine some light.... Dragons love to be alone besides when mating... for the most point. Now im not that solitary but when Im depressed of somethings on my mind I like to be left alone and be able to think without being asked "are you ok?" or "whats wrong?" or even " I know somethings wrong... tell me whats wrong" and when i say i dont want to talk about it or nor right now I get pired into like a crow bar prying open a door. Oh and one more thing before I go... I have no privacy. not even in the shower O.=.O Like this morning I was in the shower and he was laying down.. he comes into the bathroom and opens the shower curtin and says his back hurts and asked if i would come rub it... i told him sure i would when i got out of the shower.... he keeps comming in and out of the bathroom every like 2 minutes and looking in on me asking if i was getting out..... I just like my privacy... especially when im mated i dont like others looking at me.... v.=.v I dont want Eke getting any wrong ideas thinking im cheating on him when Im not and never would want to. For thoes of you that didnt know me and Exavier broke up because of distance hurting him alot more then anyone should go through... Me and Eke have been mated for about a week or soo and I love him with all my heart. <3 But I hope to be in NY soon... I miss my friends there.

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